Capsule Review of ‘Twisters’

The Plot: An ex-storm chaser heeds the call to adventure and returns to the Midwest, just in time to get caught up in a once-in-a-lifetime tornado outbreak.

The Verdict: Flat and uninvolving, with an undercooked love triangle that bends vanilla. Liked the part where the screen gets sucked out of the old movie theater, opening a window to a world where a monster tornado is bearing down on the audience. Is that a metaphor for climate change and escapist entertainment, or is it just an homage to the Lumière brothers and their silent-film train?

All I know is, Maura Tierney and Helen Hunt were both NBC sitcom stars — primetime players — when the original Twister blew through multiplexes. Now, Tierney’s aged into the role of the protagonist’s mother, but somehow, Hollywood screenwriting hasn’t grown up with her. She’s alive, though, which just goes to show that these Twisters are really a twice-in-a-lifetime event. 

When I saw the name Joseph Kosinski in the credits, things clicked. Twisters isn’t quite a legacy sequel like Top Gun: Maverick, though they do share It-guy Glen Powell in addition to Kosinski’s involvement. Yet devices named Dorothy are still flying around Oklahoma, and even that highlight theater scene recalls the ’96 drive-in, with Frankenstein simply substituted for The Shining. I suspect certain characters might match up with those in Twister, too, but they aren’t so much characters as they are recycled ideas — chickens in cow’s clothing, if you will.

It was this or Deadpool & Wolverine, but I managed to go a whole year (13 months, actually) without seeing a superhero movie, and I thought I’d keep it that way. Wrong pick?